Letting go is the hardest thing to do

Case: 69 years old lady suffering from breast cancer, with lung and liver metastasis. Her consciousness deteriorated at the end of my on call. She showed signs of gasping, indicating that the end of life is closing in.

The 80+ years old mother was in distress, seeing the unaroused daughter. She tried so hard: shook her, called her, pleaded us to do something, all in hope to hear her daughter’s voice again. Yet, the daughter lay there, weak and unaware of the voice of her beloved mother. It has always been devastating to see an elderly sending off the younger children. Who doesn’t love their child?

Letting go is indeed the hardest thing to do. We have so little time in life, and working in this field of work allowed me to be up close with death. Life is so fragile and impermanent. Medicine can only do so much for the ill, but we can always be there for our loved ones. Don’t wait till it’s too late.

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Remain hopeful

Case: An elderly with liver cirrhosis and occasional coughing was admitted to manage hepatic encephalopathy. She had an episode of vomiting & choking which led to aspiration pneumonia. Hypotension and desaturation ensued. While she is in DNR status, we tried our best to resuscitate her with fluids, performed sputum suction, provided oxygen therapy and started her on antibiotics. Her vitals recovered gradually and stabilized. However, she’s not out of the woods yet.

Just when life is about to come to an end, our path crossed, where I tried a little bit to help, and you tried a little more to live.

May you go though this challenge and live to see another day.

I wish you all the best.

I’d also like to take this opportunity to thank the people around me, who gave me emotional support when I needed it the most.

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Giving just enough

No matter how knowledgeable a person may be, there is a need to gauge how well the message is received by the other party.

Stuff too much, and the recipient suffers from information overload.

Stuff too little, and the recipient enters into boredom.

It comes to a point, the communicator needs constantly check on how well the other person is receiving the message.

When the person seemed clueless, or having a hard time digesting the information, providing more information may not be effective in solving the problem. Instead, try to gauge how much the person has understood, and which part of the key information is still missing that hinders his/her understanding.

The student may be a slow learner, but the teacher/mentor plays an even greater role in getting the information across and helping the slow learner grow.

Well, in short...

I am just another slow learner who is trying hard to keep up the learning pace on this fast-paced society. So please bear with me while I’m still understanding how things work.

If you can’t wait, I don’t mind you leaving me alone and let me learn on my own.

Don’t worry, I’ll find my own way.

When it comes to a day where I am the one sharing the knowledge, I will make sure the other slow learners grow well, because I understand how it feels to be a slow learner.

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A role to play

A cook, cleaner, nurse, doctor, artist, teacher, mechanic, technician, and many other unlisted professions.

They have one thing in common: A role to play in this society.

Everyone is deem important in ensuring this society functions well, and everyone deserves the respect they can get.

I am often humbled and inspired by the people I meet. Thank you for reminding me that I can be more than I am today.

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The unsung heroes

I am not possible if not for the unsung heroes that appeared during my life’s journey. They gave me guidance, inspired me to do better, and made me a better man.

Thank you for being there. I shall repay that debt by paying it forward, inspiring others too.

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Believe

Enough with the self-doubts. “Believe in yourself!” that’s what they said.

One’s potential can only be unleashed when you believe in yourself.

Since life is so unfair, why make succumb to it when all you have to do is believe that you’ll be successful too? Believe in your strengths, make them shine. Learn your weaknesses, work on them. You’ll be there someday.

Story behind this photograph: He is an acapella band member for VOX. The crowd, spotlights, stage… They are all fruits of hard, persistent work. True potentials are unleased when you believe in your strengths and make them work for you. Someday, everyone will have their own stage to shine.

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Love for machines

The love for these beasts is undeniable, and this father brought his children along to see all motorcycles. Look how the rider and the father connects, while the curious children continue to look in awe.

I spent a little time around the Biketopia event, fascinated by how these people customize their motorcycles. Though I’m not a big fan of Harley Davidson, some of the bike designs certainly caught my eye.

The Harleys are definitely getting a sportier look, as it seemed that the company are moving towards targeting the market of younger generations.

And I got a little chance of sitting in an Audi TT Coupe: Quattro too. Thanks to my bro for the shot.

Story behind the first photograph: The biker was reluctant when the father requested to take a photograph of the motorcycle together with the biker. As the biker was about to ride away, the father approached him and requested for a contact, perhaps to send photographs to him. With that connection, I was the lucky one who got this shot of the interaction between the father and the biker, with the children engrossed in curiosity.

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Band of Brothers

Now that the three bros have their own bikes, I can’t wait to go ride together…

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Selective ignorance and forgetfulness…

 

 

I guess at times, being selectively ignorant and forgetful can make one happier. However, that doesn’t mean I care less, but I care more towards the things that mattered to me.

May all the negative feedbacks be like the falling leaves, being blown away with the wind, as I stride firmly towards my goals in life, knowing that I have made a choice that I’m proud of…

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We are a team, a family, and will always be…

We have been through a lot together. There may be some arguments and conflicts, but at this very moment, we only remembered the days that we had fun, the nights we trained and practiced dance routine together, and the moment we stood on stage and vowed the audience.

Wow! Time really flies.

Congratulations on those graduating, and all the best to you guys in future undertakings. Do remember to come back again 3 years from now, when the remaining few of us are graduating. =D

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Conflicts that brought us closer

At times, little conflicts and misunderstandings could be dangerous to a relationship. But it could be a chance to challenge the solidity of trust and honesty in that relationship.

At times, when we are too close with each other, we take things for granted, and we forgot about how the other person is feeling. Let us not let each other guess what we are feeling. Use words instead. Show more appreciation when you get a helping hand, praise others often, and speak your heart out. It makes you feel comfortable, because you do not hide what you feel, and you do not have to guess what the other person feels.

This, is the lesson of communication. Use words.

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Leap of faith

Too much stuffs have been going through my mind lately, and I’m thinking that perhaps I’m getting a little bit complacent with life.

Or perhaps this place has suppressed too much of what I can do and what I want to achieve in life, that I’ve decided to make this decision.

As scary as it may seem, interestingly, many people that I’ve talked to supported my decision of doing so. When the time comes, I will reveal the decision (although most people that I’ve talked to knew about this idea).

But for now, I know that I need to pay more attention to things in life, and grab all the precious time that I have to learn, research and explore. To appreciate the people that I’ve met in life, and how they have made this my dream of mine come true.

It is a good start.

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Fate brought us together

We do not share the same flesh and blood. Yet, fate brought us together as an extended family. Not knowing who would be sitting beside me on the train today, it was really a coincidence to have met one of my YiDe Mama (懿德媽媽) on the train. In fact, she was sitting beside me.

These “foster” parents took care of us during my study here in TCU. They came every month, be it near or far, just to accompany us, listen to our ramblings, share our joy and happiness, yet ask for nothing in return. This relationship is so unique, yet so many took it for granted.

There is nothing much I can do in return of their love towards us, but I can do one thing for certain: To pay the love forward and care for the others.

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Relationships

Yesterday alone, three people I’ve known got married. A few more just got engaged.

I often find being in a relationship (be it family, friends, your loved ones, or your partner) is similar to flying a kite. You must know when to pull the kite close to you, and when to let it fly free. Pull the string too hard, and the string will snap; let the string hang loose and the kite will fall or be blown away.

Remember to spend time with your loved ones, while giving them sufficient time of their own. Give them space whenever appropriate. Knowing that the time may come where you’ll need to let this kite go will make you appreciate this current relationship more. Long distance relationships may be hard and difficult, but it could be a catalyst to a better relationship.

Remember, there is always a balance between personal and shared space.

Congratulations to the newly-weds, and may all of you have a blissful marriage.

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Do it selflessly

If one decides to devote himself to help those in need, please do so willingly. Please don’t whine and complain how badly others are doing, when that’s the reason they need your help in the first place!

We should try to lead a life as a problem solver, not a trouble maker. One do not advance and grow if you keep turning in circles, trapped in the problem or fault.

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Self-centred

Dear friend,

Perhaps I thought too much about myself that I’ve forgotten about your needs.
And perhaps I cared too much about my feelings that I disregarded yours.
And perhaps I’ve clouded you with too much of my pessimistic thoughts.
Perhaps I could be a little more optimistic like you.

I’m sorry.

But you need to know that whenever you need anything, I’ll be there.
And maybe I need to put my feelings aside and listen to yours.
At times I should have been a better listener.
Our friendship needs to be mutual benefit rather than a one man band.

Let me know, and I’ll be there.

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